Have fun with your staff. Work hard and play hard as fellow pastors. Pray together; cry and laugh together. Model loyalty and expect it. Disagreements will happen. The Bible says that, “iron sharpens iron.” This produces sparks! Let that make you into a sharper sword for God to wield. That is to be a private work, however. When the staff is in public the disagreements are left behind closed doors and when the final decision is made—there is a united front presented to the congregation.
Years ago I heard this—and I do not recall the source—don’t seek to live above your congregation or beneath your members, but live among them. Money is always a temptation for the pastor—to be covetous to have more of it. We can be covetous and seek to have a standard of living that exceeds that of the common people who give sacrificially so we can be on mission for God. You don’t have to have a big house and fine car and live in luxury. That is damaging to your witness. But you can also be covetous when you have a meager amount of money for it is more about what is in your heart than your bank account. But, we do need enough, for God says that if we do not provide for our household then we are worse than an infidel! That can harm the testimony of the church, as well. Someone may look at the smoking rust bucket we drive down the road and conclude that God’s people are not putting their money where their mouth is! I can truthfully say that God has always allowed us to live modestly as we raised five children. No one would look at the houses we lived in or the cars we rode in or the clothes we dressed in and say, “Those folks make too much money” or “those folks are poor.” They wouldn’t think much about it either way—and we have tried to view finances that way.
Leadership is not about having a title, but a testimony. I believe I first heard John Maxwell say that. A “Reverend” in front of your name carries little weight and an ordination certificate will not make the congregation respect you unless your character and conduct demonstrate that you are a leader. Credibility with the church must be earned and a seminary degree alone does not assure it. If you have to demand, “Listen to me—I am your pastor!” then it actually means that you are not—at least not yet. Serve the Lord with integrity and serve the people with fidelity and they will honor you by following you if they have an ounce of genuine spirituality.
Some hills are not big enough to die on. You’ve heard that I am sure. It’s true that there are matters in church life that cannot be compromised or your leadership is jeopardized. Moral and doctrinal issues require that we draw a line in the sand. There will be other decisions that demand you dig in your heels or you will not move forward. Then, there are many matters where you can try a different way or pray and wait for a more opportune time.
Always remember that in contentious issues, there will be collateral damage if you bull ahead. Some on the periphery will not understand. Immature Christians may not grasp what has occurred. There are often family members that are wounded. I am not saying that can always be avoided. Yet, one must ask if this particular issue is worth doing that. I have found that if there are a few folks or a pet program that might be hindering the progress of the ministry that time may win them over or at least neutralize their influence—and the pet program, if not fed, dies of natural causes.
You can often plow around a stump. You do not have to dynamite them all! When you blow up a stump, it makes a lot of noise and stirs up a lot of dirt.
